When Expectations Go Unfulfilled

Humans hold just about every conceivable type of expectation in their hearts.  They dream, aspire, imagine and project future goals and desires.  However, not all expectations will be fulfilled – not even for Christians!  Let me suggest three steps you can take when expectations go unfulfilled.

Love God unconditionally.  Scripture contains thousands of commands issued by the mouth of the Lord.  Which command means most to him?  “Love the Lord your God with all your heart…soul…and mind.  This is the first and greatest commandment” (Matthew 22:37).  We must keep loving God supremely as our first and greatest desire.  When he doesn’t answer prayer the way you expected, cling to him more tightly.  We serve God, not because of the things he has given, but because of who he is.  Christians who “delight in the Lord” ardently, fervently, and wholeheartedly pursue an ever deeper relationship with God.  God is their all-consuming desire!  Then they trust him to only grant desires that enhance our relationship with his person.

When we take disappointment too seriously, we are clinging to God too lightly.

Quit questioning yourself.  So often we torment ourselves by questioning the decisions which led to unfulfilled expectations.  Basically, we blame past decisions for present disappointments.  However, the Word of the Lord plainly declares, “I am the Lord your God who…directs you in the way you should go” (Isaiah 48:17).  Who led Jesus into the wilderness to be tempted by the enemy?  The Holy Spirit!   God doesn’t always lead us into comfortable surroundings, so unfulfilled expectations do not indicate that you missed God’s will.  Refuse to question yourself anymore.  “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past” (Isaiah 43:18).

Focus attention on the next life.  How easily we Christians fasten ourselves to this earthly experience.  Our whole emphasis revolves around desires and expectations for life on earth.  Then, when things don’t turn out as we expected, we give ourselves over to despair.  But we must remember, this life is not about this life; this life merely prepares us for the next one.  Life on this earth molds us for life in the new earth.  Disappointment over unfulfilled expectations indicates that we are treasuring earthly life more highly than life in the next age.  Unfulfilled expectations serve as instruments in God’s hands for shaping us into humans worthy to live with him and serve him in eternity.